


Another Year Older

by khughes830



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Birthday Cake, F/M, Happy Birthday
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 11:29:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13680783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khughes830/pseuds/khughes830
Summary: Submission for The Barson Daily Valentine's Fic-a-thon.  Prompt is dessert in the nice category.  For the first time in 6 years, he doesn't have the squad around to celebrate his birthday.





	Another Year Older

If he was being honest, he always did enjoy fall on the Harvard campus. The leaves, the cool air, the way the coffee tasted. He had hoped that the coming fall would help him shake the feelings he had been having… well, since he walked out of New York City in February. 

He had taken 8 weeks to travel, sleep, rest, reset. The beach, the mountains, even his old bedroom at his mother's house. He read. He caught up on television he had missed. He raved to everyone about The Crown. But there was still this feeling that was present. At first, he tried to ignore it, but it just never went away. He just figured out how to live with it. He couldn't bring himself to admit what that feeling was. The few times he had indulged himself, all he could see were those brown eyes filled with tears and it made his stomach drop. So, he just did his best not to think like that. 

At first his phone was silent. Eerily silent. But then the calls started. First his mother, which is how he wound up staying with her for a little bit. Then Rita. And then, one day, his old advisor from Harvard Law. Begging him for a meeting. So, he went. The meeting turned into a one-off lecture which turned into a series which turned into him, here, having an office for the school year, teaching a special series to the pre-law students. He only promised the year. After having been stuck… maybe even a little trapped if he was being honest… in his job for so long, he couldn't bring himself to commit to anything for any length of time. Even his apartment was rented month to month. Because admitting that would mean he was never going back.

And on today, of all days, making that decision was almost too much. It was his birthday. The first one in 6 years that wouldn't be spent eating sheet cake in her office. The first year she dragged him, almost kicking and screaming, into having one piece. It was something, he found out, she prided herself on. Birthdays and cakes and taking a moment to celebrate being another year older. Another year wiser.

He laughed to himself as he crossed campus from his favorite coffee cart to his office. He was glad for the sunglasses as thinking back to last year, with her smile and her apologies that Noah had spelled his name wrong, brought tears to his eyes. He hadn't told a soul what today was. He couldn't bear the thought of trying to celebrate it with others. He had demanded his mother stay away. She tried to come up, he put his foot down. Rita sent a text that he hadn't replied to yet. He hoped she would understand. 

The cool air of the law building hit his face. Students said hello as they walked past, but he was stuck in his own head. The memories of this day were coming fast and furious. Laughing on the couch of her office while they ate cake. Candles and off-key singing. The hug that he cherished each year. The silence between them was deafening. He wasn't sure why he was surprised. He walked away. He chickened out, telling her he needed to move on when he could see in her eyes what she wanted, or maybe even needed. He climbed the steps, mentally kicking himself for not being stronger for her. He left. Why he thought then that she would reach out was beyond him. He couldn't blame her. He checked the headlines just about every day. Pictures of her appeared from time to time. It was like the universe knew today was his birthday, because he managed to catch a clip of her being interviewed before he left his apartment this morning. Her voice was still strong, but her eyes looked tired. Her face seemed a little sad. Maybe the gift of hearing her voice today had to be tempered with him seeing her demeanor. 

He paused outside his office. He would treat himself on the way home - a good bottle of scotch, a large pizza and some cheesy Netflix movie. He sighed, grabbing the handle of his door, pulling it open. Maybe he would start ignoring his birthday from here on out. 

But he froze as he took a step in. His first thought was "who the hell found out!?!" as he saw the sheet cake sitting on his desk. Then, he noticed the person behind the cake, sitting in his chair and he knew his birthday wouldn't be ignored this year. 

"I brought dessert" Olivia choked out. 

He dropped his bag at his feet, unable to move. She pushed herself out of his chair, wringing her hands. He couldn't believe she was here. Maybe he hadn't quite woken up for the day yet. 

"Happy birthday, Rafael" she said a little louder, shaking him out of his frozen state. He almost ran across his small office, grabbing her up in his arms, crushing her against him. The moment he breathed her in as he buried his nose in her hair, he knew this was no dream. They stood there, wrapped up in each other, him with his eyes closed and his face pressed into her neck, her lightly scratching her nails up and down the nape of his neck. He finally pulled back to look at her. It had been so long, he didn't realize her face was like a drug to him. He had been in recovery - a piss poor recovery where she haunted his dreams, but a recovery nonetheless - but now he fell head first and he was fine with it. 

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"It's your birthday, Rafa. I couldn't… I couldn't ignore it. It felt wrong."

"How did you know I was here?"

"Lucia."

He smiled. "So, you two are friends now?"

Olivia nodded, tears in her eyes. "Yes. We ran into each other one day and we just… well, honestly… we took solace in each other. Made us both feel a little closer to you." He choked back the tears.

"I'm sorry" he whispered.

She shook her head. "Don't be. We understand. We may not like it, but we understand. Besides, Boston isn't too far from New York. It is closer than the beaches of Grand Cayman."

"Liv, you have got to see that place. It's amazing."

"Take me sometime." The fire he saw in her eyes as she said those words made his heart beat in a way it hadn't in a very long time. He missed it. 

"A chance to see you on the beach in a bikini? That's an offer I can't refuse." And she laughed that laugh that he knew was reserved only for him. He had missed that too. This was turning into an amazing birthday. 

"Noah wanted to make sure I wished you a happy birthday too. He drew you a picture. He was really mad when I told him I was coming up here today and he had to stay home."

"Lucy keeping him?"

"Actually, your mother. You think her and I have become fast friends? You should see those two together, Rafa. It… well I think it has helped him, and me, heal from Sheila." He bit his lip, doing his best to keep the tears from falling. She cocked her head to the side, resting her hand on his face. 

"How long are you here for?" he choked out. 

She ran her hand up into his hair. "I've got a ticket back tonight and tomorrow night. Wasn't sure how this was going to go." 

"I think it's going to go well, Liv." 

"Happy birthday, Rafa. You want some cake?"

"In a second. There's something else I want first." He pressed his lips to hers and had to keep himself from throwing her down on his desk when she moaned loudly, tightening her arms around his shoulders. They finally broke, panting, lips swollen and eyes blown wide. 

"Let's get out of here" she whispered. 

"In a minute. First, we are going to eat a piece of cake on my couch over there. It's tradition." She laughed and nodded. This was going to rank as the best birthday dessert ever.


End file.
